Preparation

Well I heard Obama's first press conference last night. As all 2 people who actually read this blog know, I'm not a huge fan of Obama, not only because he's black, but also because he's not 100% white. (enter scant amounts of sarcasm here)

This economy seems to be heading down the shitter and I'm sure in about 6 months this is exactly what I'll be doing:

Shoveling Snow

I actually really like shoveling snow. Its one chore I really enjoy doing, probably because we never get enough snow for me to ever get sick of it and dread the sight of a pile of snow keeping me from driving off somewhere.

I woke up this morning to 4" of snow covering my driveway and immediately jumped outside with a shovel to clean my driveway. The air never gets as clean as it is after a fresh snow the night before. I love it.

I love yerba mate. I drink it just about every morning. Not only is it a great hangover cure, but its just down right delicious. And coffee is for faggots and losers. This stuff is also under $3 for a 5 lbs bag of it, which lasts months. Some compare the flavor to grass clippings or yard waste, and honestly, I have to agree with them. But if you eat enough piles of shit, I'm sure you'll get used to the taste of that too.

So this morning, I was reheating it for my second cup (you can reuse the stuff many, many times), and some idiot sales man came in while it was cooling off in the microwave. So I decided to heat it up again, and it fucking exploded on me. FUCK NO BUDDY! Bullshit. So here's a pic of my mess.

2009 - The Year of the Asshole

Well, its 2009, and my first post of the year. The holidays were good. I'm still caught in a rut between wishing I kept getting tons of presents like I did as a little kid and really not giving two shits about the whole gift giving thing to begin with. Here are a few reasons why Christmas is pointless:

- Every time I try to come up with a wish list or a gift list, I realize I've already bought all the stuff I want. Throughout the year, if I want something, I just go out and get it.
- Thanksgiving was always the buffer that 'kick started' the Christmas season, now, as soon as Halloween is over, we're right onto Christmas. I love Thanksgiving, maybe more so than Christmas. The food is fantastic, and other than seeing old friends and having dinner, there are no expectations.
- As we all know, Christmas is consumerism gone mad. I won't deny I'm very much a consumer myself, I spend more than I probably should, but I'm single so I excuse it by asking 'what else do I have money for?' -- The notion that so many retailers are talking about going belly up because sales are down 5% from last year really makes me laugh. I'm so fascinated with how entire industries are based upon growth and can't even function when sales plateau. FUCK THEM. NOW SELL ME YOUR FLAT SCREEN FOR 90% OFF.

I forsee this year being the year of the asshole. The economy is going down, businesses are collapsing, people are panicking. The asshole in everyone will come out in full force this year.

The wind chill factor

Many of you may know my hatred and disdain for the "wind chill factor". First off, it just sounds gay. Secondly people that refer to it or talk about it sound gay, and stupid. I want to smack each and every one of you.

There's no such thing as "the wind chill factor". Only the "stupid asshole factor".

The wind chill is pointless, for these very reasons: A thermostat tells the scientific temperature. Thats how hot and/or cold it is outside. Yes, wind has a cooling effect, and if the wind pushes a cold front through, the temperature will drop, lowering the measurement on the thermostat. (This is the only time the wind chill actually occurs.) The other times wind chill actually occurs is when faggot news stations need excuses to get idiots all riled up about something that doesn't actually exist. If there is a 10 degree wind chill factor, why does water not freeze? Oh wait. Wind chill just tells you 'how cold it feels' outside. Well how the fuck do you know how I feel outside?

Today its actually 11 degrees outside. Last week it was in the 30s, but with a 11 degree wind chill. Today the sun is shining bright. How come there is never any mention of the warming effect the sun has on cold temperatures? It certainly feels warmer when I'm in the sunlight as opposed to in the shade or during a cloudy day. THE SUN HAS A WARMING EFFECT! DUH!! Yes, of course it does. And when the sun's warming effect is strong enough to raise the temperature, it indeed gets warmer!

And whats even more ridiculous is that there is a scientific formula to determine this 'apparent temperature'! Great, let's apply the standards and physics of science to the purely subjective thoughts and emotions of the complete imbeciles that walk this earth. This makes lots of sense. Well it makes perfect sense if you own a news/media outlet and you have nothing to talk about because nothing is going on, but your existence is dependent upon idiots believing every word you say and staying glued to your channel to boost ratings and ad revenue.

I'm sure some idiots will think otherwise, and come back to me w/ all the scientific data that supports and defends a wind chill factor, but the reality is that its a purely subjective 'measurement'. Temperature is a standard measure. If it says its 30 degrees outside, it feels like its 30 degrees. Because if it felt any colder, the thermostat would read a lower temperature. Got it? Good.

Back to the Stupid Asshole Factor. Simply take X number of assholes multiplied by Y number of news channels and newspapers that report on the wind chill = Stupid Asshole Factor.

Obituary - The End Complete

10/10 album. My reviews are purely subjective, but I must say this is one of the best death metal albums of all time. John Tardy's vocals were at his best with this album and World Demise (another 10/10 album), the tempo and speed and pace of the album is fantastic. No 'blast beats' just great, straight forward pace. Allen West's solos are top notch.

Listen to every song on this album over and over again now.

this calls for a RIGHT ON BUDDY!!!

Many people talk about their dream homes, the design, landscaping, where the swimming pool goes, how big the kitchen is, etc. I really don't give a shit about any of that.

All I'm concerned about is having my own Private Ninja Training Camp: